Katy Perry's Boobs

I understand the hoopla with this, I mean parents will always find something to complain about when it comes to pop culture. And there's been lots of fuss all over the message board, but the first thing that came to my mind that hasn't been mentioned anywhere is "Isn't there some kind of wardrobe stylist on Sesame Street that would provide something appropriate to wear?" It's a TV show; don't they screen these kind of things? Or maybe, they just let her show up in whatever she wants.

In any case, she knows how to rock a pin-up look. And truth be told, the song still sounds kind of dirty.

If my song had wings!

I am singing this song right now.

In college, Amy said I reminded her of a silent movie star. Maybe I should just record a bunch of art songs and film them in black and white.

I am seriously lacking the brainpower to do some musical analysis. I have not been getting nearly enough sleep and my words aren't making sense. I'll give you this: I do like the subtle sweetness of this video. It seems like too many opera singers (myself included) try way too hard to be bombastic and overpowering, even in pianissimo and there's such a relaxing quality to her tone.

Just call me FrankenGinny

All those years of feeling insecure and dropping your head down away from people is going to kill you!


Maybe.

I seem to have fallen victim to something entitled “Acute Disk Prolapse”. In layman’s terms I have a slipped disk in my neck vertebrae. Which means I feel a very specific sharp pain in the left side of my neck almost all the time. My neck had been irritating me since the beginning of the summer and honestly I had been ignoring it hoping it would go away. But it didn’t. Then it got to the point where my headaches wouldn’t stop and I couldn’t turn my neck over my left side. Fun. Now I find myself with two Physical Therapy (which is kind of like getting a massage, only not as fun.) appointments a week.

Apparently this is fairly common. For 40-somethings who’ve sat at their desks for 15 years. I guess my body has always been quicker to mature than others. Ha. At the very least, maybe I can put some bolts in my neck and have a cah-razy costume for Halloween. Just call me FrankenGinny.

Also, I tried to make myself feel better by downing 10 or so ibeprofun a day. Clearly, I'm ignorant when it comes to anti-inflammotaries and should read more backs of bottles. Despite the fact that it did numb the pain temporarily, take a lesson from the woman who was revisiting her beef strogonoff in the middle of the night: do NOT take that many pills on a regular basis.

I’m hoping that a couple of weeks of PT will help because it is no fun to wake up physically miserable every single morning. So right at this point in my life where I have so much to do, I have to slow down and R-E-L-A-X because my body has it in for me. Which really requires a little more planning, a little more saying "no" and a lot more laying on the floor stretching my neck thinking "how the hell did I get myself into this?"

My mother, the "agent"

I wish my mother was an actual competent agent with connections and credintials instead of some self-appointed "volunteer" headhunter that makes phone calls to companies on my behalf saying she knows a young professional with a BFA and makes up bizarro stories about how she's an art teacher and is trying to find employment for someone who is in "no way her daughter". It's one thing to use your connections. It's another thing to just meddle. My mother, the professional. My mother is not an art teacher. Throwing clashing splashes of color on a wall and safety pinning pillow shams together does not an art teacher make.

My mother finds all these "leads" from calling people and gushing about how talented and established I am without ever telling them anything about me. It's the cold call equivilent of tabloid news. She's started doing it for Braden too, much to his chagrin. We're adults and even though it's unwarrented, there's no saying "no." The word "no" is temporary in my Mom's mind, like a wart you file down but just comes back. It does make me wish we cut ourselves off from her market, aka the Triangle, since she's lived here for 50 years and claims to have connections with everybody.

Braden's mom is a professional artist. She's involved in organizations and galleries and has a website and everything. My mother knows how to put a classy and stylish outfit together, but I wouldn't exactly call that art.

Mom rant over.

She might be on to somthing. She introduced me to my teaching job now, which is very promising but only part time. I love it though. I love my students - they make me laugh and I continue to be impressed with their talent. I don't think I was that talented at 16. If I can help these students get the part they want or get into the conservatory they want, that would be a profound accomplishment. Losing on everything I worked for, but providing a better oppurtunity for someone else? I suppose that's what teaching is all about.

The Monti

This past weekend, Braden and I went to see The Monti at the Carrboro ArtsCenter. The Monti is a North Carolina based spoken narrative forum where inspired storytellers and tell a story within the theme within a certain time limit (to keep people from rambling). It's inspired by one in New York called The Moth. It's hard to describe if you never seen anything like it, but it's kind of like a David Sedaris reading meets occasional stand-up comedy. I first got into the Monti when I heard it on NPR (and yes, I have Braden to thank for introducing me to the joys of NPR. NPR was just not something we listened to in our house growing up, nor would I ever think to listen to it on my own.) I heard these people sharing these incredibly compelling stories on the air and since I'm a huge fan of memoir, I thought "I have to see this!"

I love stories about real-life stories about people and their community unit. Perhaps this was why I was so interested in sociology in college. So watching The Monti was right up my alley. The headliner was a man by the name of Greg Taylor, who was exonerated after 17 years in prison where he was wrongfully accused of murder. His story mostly covered how he was overwhelmed with choices after leaving prison; all the items for sale in Target, the massive amounts of buttons on washing machines and cell phones, the option to use a fork and knife at dinner. We don't really think about the little details of the freedoms we have and how profound those details are.

The Monti has an occasional "open-mic night" called StorySlam where audience members can tell a story for 5 minutes under the assigned theme. I'd really love to participate but alas most of them all fall on Tuesday nights and alas I have work! But I too love sharing stories and I think it'd be fun and educational to participate. Orating is a bit of lost art, one that goes back way before television, radio, and any type of recording.

I highly recommend The Monti for Triangle visitors and natives. It made for a good date night...not too long of a show. We were able to grab a drink before hand and some wings and drinks afterwards...and also more drinks after that. Between The Station, The ArtsCenter, Ba Da Wings and Speakeasy, we certainly hit the best of Carrboro. All and all, very successful Saturday night out.

Audition Etiquette

Yesterday, I helped adjudicate the song and dance auditions for TPAC's Broadway Revue. Watching a bevy of 8-16 year olds audition is exhausting. I had forgotten about all the adolescent drama that goes into producing the drama. It had been a long time, if it all, that I had been on "the other side" of the table. It probably helped since I was fresh talent and didn't know any of these kids personalities. In any case, some of their audition techniques were sloppy. At least I have a lesson plan for Tuesday -- We are SO working on Intros!!

Audition Intro Etiquette & Tips:
- Before you even walk into the room, take a deep breath and imagine from beginning to end a successful audition. A positive mindset leads to a positive audition.
- When you walk in the room, SAY HELLO and SMILE to the adjudicators. Remember, "first impressions" go a long way.
- If you are singing, walk over to the accompanist, hand them your music, explain where you are starting and ending, softly sing your tempo. Make sure you music is readable and has cuts or changes clearly marked. This is part of being prepared. If you are doing a monologue let them know if you are going to sing first or do the monologue first.
- Always let the accompanist know if you want them to play an intro or just the first note. Practice IN ADVANCE how you want to start a song. The scariest part of an audition song is starting it. (I prefer to just have them play the first note because I like to control when I'm starting the song and so I know exactly what my note is. Others find it easier with a short musical intro.)
- If the audition requests 16 bars, DO 16 BARS. However, if the cut lends itself to 20-24 bars, do that. Some songs don't comfortably fit into 16 bar cuts. BUT, keep it under 32 bars. The reason auditions ask for 16 bars is for time and given the choice, people always do more than that. If we asked for 32 bars, people would do the whole song. It's true. In fact, there will always be people who try to do the whole song no matter what because it shows off "their range". If you can show us your range in a whole song or play, you can do it in a 1 minute cut too.
- After you are done speaking to the accompanist, ask where the adjudicators would like you to stand and go where they tell you. (usually there's an X or a line of tape on the floor). Plant your feet and let your arms rest at your side. Don't wiggle or sway. Take a breath and center yourself.
- Wait until they are making eye contact with you (sometimes they will look at your resume and audition form or still be making notes as you enter). Smile and state your name, your # (if you have one) and what pieces you are doing. "Hi my name is Jenny Jones, #45 and I'll be singing "If I Loved You" and doing a piece from Shakespeare's "As You Like It"" Say this loudly and clearly. Part of the audition is seeing if you can project and enunciate. (That's why we put the tape so far back in the room.)
- DO NOT make excuses about being nervous, sick, not knowing your music, etc. This looks SO unprofessional. Remember, preparedness is half of a successful audition! I have seen extremely talented people muddy up their auditions by making huge deals about their pieces and how they are nervous they are. Keep it to yourself! Part of the audition is how you present yourself. Auditioneers don't care if you make mistakes or are nervous. We know people get nervous in auditions. Everybody gets nervous in auditions. What we do care about is how you handle those nerves. One of the things we remember most is CONFIDENCE, not little errors.
- BREATHE. Take in your surroundings. Find a focal point at eye level to start your pieces (most adjudicators prefer if you don't do the piece right at them.) Depending on space, I like to pick a point right behind them or a few chairs in front of them. Unless it is a bold and SPECIFIC acting choice, don't start your piece looking at the ground or at the ceiling.
- If you are doing a song, there are two ways to let the accompanist know you are ready. The first is to acknowledge them with eye contact and a small nod. The other more commonly used way is by simply taking a breath and prepping yourself. If you look ready and feel ready, the accompanist will start. The more you audition, the smoother this transition will be.
- Make sure you face out during the majority of your pieces. I have seen people do entire songs and monologues profile. Not only is it odd to watch, it obscures the face. You can move away from the X, but make sure you stay in the general area and find your way back to the spot by the end of your pieces.
- Take a beat on the last moment of your piece and smoothly ease back into yourself. Say THANK YOU loudly and clearly. You did it! Take another breath to center yourself after you've finished. DO NOT apologize if you've made any mistakes (every single person auditioning will make a mistake). Wait to see if they have comments or requests. If not, take your music from the pianist, thank everyone again and leave the room with your head held high.
- Don't diss other auditionees or gossip about the audition. Sometimes there are other company members, directors or other important adults in the lobby. Remember, you are auditioning yourself so don't let it go to waste by ruining your reputation in the lobby!
- Finally, don't beat yourself  after you leave the room. Often, we are our own worst enemy. Feeling prepared and confident about our work leads to more successful auditions in the long run. Better auditions make us better performers!

The New Friend Conundrum

It is hard to make friends once your out of the college. It is especially hard for ME to make friends in general. It's not that I don't meet new people. I have that moment after I meet them  and I'm staring at my phone in confusion "should I call them? should I wait for them to call me?" So I usually text them (hey would you like to go get sushi on Wednesday? I had so much fun meeting you.") and either they are busy or something comes up in my life. And I apologize and I NEVER HEAR FROM THEM AGAIN. I don't try to meet up with them again because, gosh, it was just too hard the first time.

There was a girl I met at a bar about 6 months ago. She was really into film and we seemed to hit it off even though we were both tipsy. I pretty much assumed we were destined to be best buddies. So I had her number in my phone and went the through the whole "let's get sushi" charade. Nothing ever happened. At some point during a metaphysical contact cleaning months later, I deleted her number.

So I had dinner at PF Changs last weekend, where she works and she recognized me! Holy cow! Serendipitous friendship! I imagined wonderful girly dates of window shopping and guilt-free gelato. I said I would call her only to realize later that I DIDN'T HAVE HER PHONE NUMBER. I also, I never knew her last name. This friendship was starting to feel like a one night stand that I had shrouded in glory.

So I can go back to Chang's and if she's there ask for her phone number (or ask from her co-workers...that's not creepy). Braden suggests I troll the Facebook search box for an hour and see if I recognize her face. Or I can just wait until we meet again...fate could be on my side, right?

Hot for teacher

Apparently, I have a tendency to kiss straight on and completely smush Braden's nose. Ex-boyfriends can attest: I have always been a rather aggressive smoocher. I would make the worst soap star ever. In my defense, my neck injury makes turning my head rather uncomfortable.

I did not subject anyone to Cher hair, but Braden and both discovered that is insanely difficult to find photogenic ways to pose ourselves. A lot of the photos we were standing there like bad prom set-ups. How do you stand up and look "romantic" in posed photos? It either looks way too slack or awkward, as in "how do we position these limbs of ours???" Do people just walk through the woods, holding hands and smiling? I THINK NOT.

I am looking forward to the day that I become Virginia Leonard and no longer Ginny Buckner. Shed your name, shed your unwanted idenity? Getting married is the ultimate benefit for those looking for a change in their persona. It's kind of like going to college. It's a clean slate.

I started teaching yesterday. I have about 12 kids in each class for each age group 7-9s, 10-12s, and teens. I have a much better rapport with teens than the little ones. And don't get me started on the 7-9 year olds. For my first day, I just felt like I was doing crowd control. A lot of my beginning exercises involve sort of free exploring and that just did not cut it with the wee ones. I think more disipline is neccessary. I think I'm gonna have to do a lot more research on what works and what doesn't.

I don't know if I'm a natural at this, but I hope I can help the kids grow and achieve whatever they want to achieve. Most of my teen class want to be MT majors, so I want to help them get there!

Tonight I have an audition for "The Magic Flute". As a soprano, it's kind of a crap shoot. From what I understand here is the ratio of talent: 10 sopranos for every mezzo, tenor and baritone. I also overslept this morning and look a little less than glam as of now. Oh well...positive thinking!

Snap out of it!

I may not be a New York Italian, but I've always believed that big boisterous Southern families are not that much different than Italian ones.

I watched Moonstruck tonight, which is one of my favorite romantic movies of all time. It's like a photograph come to life of an Italian family in Brooklyn and the potential for romance. Cher falls in love with Nicholas Cage (before he became a caricature of himself). My favorite part is when she gets a fantastic 80s hair makeover and they go to the opera. The soundtrack consists of lots of little redone bits from La Boheme. When all the characters look at the moon ("It's like a big snowball."), Musetta's Waltz plays in the background. It's such a great little movie about real people falling in love and what that means in the context of family.

Tomorrow, we're getting engagement pictures done. I'm tempted to pull out the "Cher-do" (Lord knows I have the hair to do it.) but I wouldn't subject Braden to that.

Even when I lose, I still win.

Right now, I'm temping downtown. Which means I get to train myself in a variety of office grunt work skills such as building MS word templates and filing and making double-sided copies. And while it can be somewhat disenchanting being a 20-something temp, I have to remember that lots of people became successful inspite of their insepid temp work.

- Ryan from "The Office" - Mostly just succeeds with impersonating the latest business trend. Right now I think he's somewhere between Gordon Gecko and hipster office chic.
- Tanya (Jane Adams) from "Hung" - Oh, to rampage on my co-workers by screaming "I'M A MOTHERF**KING PIMP!" Woman, you and your mousey resolve continue to inspire me.
- Julie Powell from "Julie and Julia" - Hey, she got a movie and second book deal. And she was an actress! And not only that, the only real person on this list.

I guess I'm not proving my point by coming up with fictionalized characters. The truth is people don't like to read about losers who continue to lose. No one wants to watch the movie where the temp is still the temp at the end of the movie, unless the director is trying to make some point with dramatic irony.

Tonight my voice lessons start up again. And so begins the home stretch towards grad school. And after admitting my fear, I am ready to buckle down and pursue this bitch. I don't care if my social contacts are weak or that my last batch of auditions resulted in nothing. It is so hard to disegard feelings of insecurity but well...I don't have a choice.

Life is young. And when you work downtown, you quickly realize that there are peopel wandering around that have it so much worse than you. I'll refrain from ghetto stereotypes, but even when I lose, I still win. In little ways. For example:

- I have a fiance (who, among other things, loves me sincerely and doesn't beat me)
- We have some inspired wedding plans and honeymoon plans (you can read about them here: http://www.ginnyandbraden.blogspot.com/)
- I'm not in rehab (zing)
- I have my voice. I'll always have that.